Steyning Mummers Play
Steyning Mummers Play

SUSSEX TIPTEERER'S PLAY


DRAMATIS PERSONAE

MummerLines
Father Christmas19
St. George20
Noble Captain32
Turkish Knight15
Valiant Soldier15
Bold Prince8
Doctor23
Prince Of Peace6
Johny Jack5

ENTER FATHER CHRISTMAS
Father Christmas: In comes I, old Father Christmas, am I welcome or am I not?
Sometimes I am cold sometimes I am hot,
I hope that Old Father Christmas will never be forgot.
Room, Ladies and gentlemen, room I pray,
While I lead St. George and all his noble men this way,
Walk in St George and act thy part,
And show the ladies and gentlemen thy valiant art.
Walk in St George!
ENTER ST. GEORGE
St. George: In comes I St George, That man of courage bold;
With my sword and shield I have won ten thousands of gold,
I fought the fiery Dragon, and brought him to great slaughter,
And by that means I gained the King of Egypts daughter.
Father Christmas: Walk in you Noble Captain.
ENTER NOBLE CAPTAIN
Noble Captain: In comes I, the Noble Captain,
Lately come from France;
With my broad sword and jolly Turk,
I'll make St George to dance.
St. George:Neither to you I am bound to bend.
Noble Captain:Why, sir, did I ever take you to be my friend?
St. George:Yes you saucy coxcomb.
Noble Captain:Coxcomb is a glorious name.
St. George:You are right to be stabbed.
Noble Captain:To be stabbed, sir, is the least I fear.
St. George:Appoint a place and I'll meet you there.
Noble Captain: The place is appointed on this ground,
Where I mean to lay the body down.
St. George:I will cross the water that is so wide.
Noble Captain: Done, sir, I'll meet you there if I am alive,
I will cross the water with our ten,
I will meet you there with ten thousand men.
St. George: I'll cut you, I'll slay you, I'll let you know,
I am St George the Briton, oh.
Noble Captain: I will cross the water with our four,
And meet you there with ten thousand more,
Oh, St George, hold thy hand,
While I send in my Turkish man.
Walk in you Turkish Knight.
ENTER TURKISH KNIGHT
Turkish Knight: In comes I, the Turkish Knight,
Come from the Turkish land to fight.
I will fight St George, that man of courage bold;
If his blood is hot, I will quickly make it cold.
St. George: Oh Turk, oh Turk, do not boast,
Or I will cut you down as small as dust.
Turkish Knight: Oh, St George, do not threaten,
Or I will cut you down with my rusty old weapon.
St. George: Oh, Turk, Oh Turk, do not caper,
Or I will cut you down with my old rapier.
( THEY FIGHT AND ST GEORGE FALLS WOUNDED )
Father Christmas: Oh Turk, Oh Turk, what have you done?
You have wounded my beloved son.
Turkish Knight: Well, didn't he give me the challenge to do it,
And how could I deny it?
See how he was, and now see how low he is.
( TURK FALLS ON ONE KNEE SLIGHTLY WOUNDED )
Father Christmas: Arise St George, and do not refrain,
But boldly rise, and fight that dreadfull Turk again.
( ST GEORGE RISES AND FIGHTS TURK AGAIN )
Turkish Knight: Down on my bending knee,
A poor Turkish slave, I crave to thee.
St. George: Get up you Turkish Knight,
Go home to your Turkish land and fight;
Go home and tell them what champion,
There is in Old England dwells.
I will send my Valiant Soldier.
Father Christmas: Walk in you Valiant Soldier
ENTER VALIANT SOLDIER
Valiant Soldier: In comes I the Valiant Soldier,
Bold Slasher is my name,
My head is crowned in iron,
My body is cased in steel,
And with my sword into my knuckle bone,
I will fight this Turk all in this field;
I will pull out my sword and fight,
Pull out my purse and pay.
For satisfaction will I have.
Turkish Knight: No satisfaction shall you have,
No satisfaction will I give,
For in a moment's time, you rascal,
I will bring you to your silent grave.
Valiant Soldier: I have travelled England, Ireland,
Scotland, France, Spain and Wales,
For what St George shall have his will,
You turkish dog I will soon kill.
ENTER BOLD PRINCE
Bold Prince: In comes I Bold Prince, with spear in hand,
Bid thee thy foes to fear not Stand,
Stand St George, that great man of command,
The ruler over the British land;
Advance the power this very hour,
Gallant sons you must obey,
Let fly your hands, and fight on,
My lads with a good huzza, hooray.
( IN A FIERCE FIGHT THE TURKISH KNIGHT IS KILLED )
Valiant Soldier: There ladies and gentleman, see what I have done,
I have cut him down like the evening sun.
Noble Captain: Oh fie, oh fie, my man is slain,
And on this ground his body is laid;
Oh for some doctor I must seek,
While my man lies bleeding here so deep.
Oh doctor, oh doctor, come with speed,
To heal the sick and raise the dead;
Oh is there a doctor to be found,
To raise this dead man from the ground?
Father Christmas: Oh yes, here's a doctor well and good,
With my hand I am endeavouring to stop the blood;
Stop the blood and heal the wound,
To raise that dead man from the ground.
ENTER DOCTOR
Father Christmas:Well, Doctor what can you cure?
Doctor: Cure the hipsey, pipsey, palsy, and the gout,
All raging pains both in and out.
A broken leg, or a broken arm,
And if the man's neck was broke,
I'll be bound to put it back together again,
Or else I would not charge you one farthing to be paid.
Noble Captain:Well doctor, what is your fee?
Doctor: My fee is nineteen pounds, nineteen shillings and eleven pence three farthings.
And half that money I demand today.
Noble Captain:Stop, doctor, stop, I will pay you in the morning.
Doctor: Morning? what is the morning to do with me?
I will take my horse and be gone.
Noble Captain:Stop, doctor, stop, here's an ass for you to ride.
Doctor: An ass, go ride your ass yourself,
A horse I rode here, and a horse I will ride away.
Noble Captain:Here, stop, doctor I'll pay you in the evening.
Doctor:Now you talk something like a man.
Noble Captain:Well, doctor, try you skill.
Doctor: Well, I have a small box of pills by my side called the Junipers;
I have also a small bottle of drops called Golden Gloster Drops.
I'll put one on his temple and one on his nose,
Put a pill in his mouth, and strike a light all over his body.
Why you see he begins to move already.
Noble Captain: Arise young man, and try to stand,
And see how gently you can walk.
Doctor: And now all for your Noble Captain I have cured your man,
I am one of the sons of the seventh son, born in High Germany,
I am not one of these runabout doctors.
What I do, I do plainly before your face.
And if you can't believe that, it is a very hard case.
ENTER PRINCE OF PEACE
Prince Of Peace: In comes I, the Prince of Peace;
The very first year that I was born, a cruel Russian war began.
Peace, ladies and gentleman peace I call,
For I am come to save you all.
Ladies and gentlemen, let you voices ring,
Clap your hands together, and let us all sing.
ENTER JOHNY JACK
Johny Jack: In comes I, little Johny Jack,
With my wife and family at my back.
Money I want, money I crave,
If you don't give me that,
I wish you in your grave.

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